Anyway. I’m going to take a nice hot shower and drink some hot tea and go back to bed. I think thats a great idea. I will blog about Ragnar soon! I had such an amazing time!!

I’ve been listening to Owl City a lot lately. The soft side of me really likes them!

Love is any of a number of emotions related to a sense of strong affection[1] and attachment. The word love can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure (“I loved that meal”) to intense interpersonal attraction (“I love my wife”). This diversity of uses and meanings, combined with the complexity of the feelings involved, makes love unusually difficult to consistently define, even compared to other emotional states.

Infatuation An object of extravagant, short-lived passion.

Desire is a sense of longing for a person or object or hoping for an outcome. The same sense is expressed by emotions such as “craving” or “hankering”. When a person desires something or someone, their sense of longing is excited by the enjoyment or the thought of the item or person, and they want to take actions to obtain their goal. The motivational aspect of desire has long been noted by philosophers; Hobbes (1588–1679) asserted that human desire is the fundamental motivation of all human action.

So I’ve discovered when your brain confuses these basic emotions -- thats when your heart hurts. However I’ve saved the deadliest emotion for last. Tis the one that hurts the worst and all should avoid it by any means necessary.

Jealousy is an emotion and typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something that the person values, such as a relationship, friendship, or love. Jealousy often consists of a combination of emotions such as anger, sadness, and disgust.

I’m not a jealous person. However, one can be driven to this emotion with little to no effort by others. When others intentionally try to make you jealous it is up to you not to deal with it. or to avoid it.

Life is consistently teaching us. Either we learn our lessons at a young or old age either way we will learn them.

I want few things out of life -- Happiness and Love. The two go hand in hand. I want other things. However -- I feel the two listed are core requirements to live life successfully.

Things I will remember going forward -- NEVER CONFUSE LOVE WITH INFATUATION OR DESIRE.

The sky is still blue, the sun still shines and I have air to breath -- I am content with life for the moment.

I guess that’s the best way to describe it. I just feel disappointed in myself today. The whole relationship situation is over my head… I posted today on twitter “and after 26 years of life my heart has been broken for the first time. nothing a little tape wont fix (I hope)…”. I’ve never had a broken heart. I’ve been hurt but not broken -- nor am I broken now. I just need to get over this.

I really don’t know how to feel about my relationship status and letting someone in so easily and loving them so easily and so completely so soon. What does this say about me? Am I weak for letting someone in so close, so soon? I don’t know… Perhaps just a lesson I needed to learn in life.

Looking at the predicament I’m in…I think that I was in denial for a long time. When I left Nelson I told myself to be single and to find myself. Hook up with people and not let them in (no relationships). I don’t know maybe I put up that front attempting to protect myself. I didn’t want to jump out of one relationship and into another, but it’s been 10 months now… I thought I was ready to be in a relationship. I think I was -- I just used poor judgement.

I was happy before…being single. I think I’m just over it. The whole being single thing. it’s whatever…

Husband and wife were sitting watching a TV program about psychology and explaining the phenomenon of “mixed emotions”.
The husband turned to his wife and said, “Honey, that is a bunch of crap. I bet you can’t tell me anything that will make me happy and sad at the same time.

She said: “Out of all your friends, you have the biggest dick.”

HAHAHAHA – How shitty it would be to have your spouse say something like that.